September 21, 2010

Habis engkau lelaki ke, because you used to want her dulu kan?

School had just started. It's a new battle all over again. I'm all armed to the last strand of the hair on my head. We'll make it through. Jom pukul semua soalan sampai tak dapat bangun. Jom dapat A+ ramai-ramai. Teacher Nani takkan give up selagi result sebenar tak keluar. Teacher Nani tak pernah ada mindset keji semacam ini: Kamu lulus pun cukuplah (no matter how weak you are).

Teacher Nani tak pernah pandang mana-mana student pun sebagai hopeless. Kamu semua sangat-sangat boleh dapat A+. The marks can be changed. You just have to change a part of yourself – start prioritizing. Stop Twilighting. A crush on a vapid, moody, sparkling, gay, 107-year-old virgin vampire does not help in your writing. His eyes are too far apart for you to even daydream about. Grow out of the box already.

***

I don't get some teachers who actually have the heart to say something as mindless as this: Student-student kami di sini memang lemah sangat-sangat. Harapan kami cukuplah setakat boleh lulus.

Look at it this way, kalau teachers yang tanggungjawab hakikinya mengubah sebijik F menjadi A (akademik atau sahsiah) pun tidak tahu cara berharap yang betul, how the hell will anything even change? Kalau harapan pun tak sebanyak mana, you people expect teachers semacam ini berusaha banyak mana? True. Pandai my readers. Banyak mana mereka berharap, banyak itulah mereka berusaha. This is one of the bullshits yang I memang tak boleh tolerate. Khianat profesyen, khianat anak didik. Why are you even in the school?

Engkau imagine sendirilah apa nak rasa kalau engkau salah seorang daripada budak-budak yang engkau letakkan harapan lulus sahaja itu. Harap nak menagih tunjuk ajar cikgu, cikgu pulak awal-awal dah give up, siap label engkau loser pulak sebab layak lulus saja. Please-lah wei. Otak ada, guna. Jangan simpan dalam mangkuk tandas.

I'm nowhere near perfection, but if I could give my 1000% for the kids and change a few Es into Bs and the same particular Bs into As, I'd know I'm on the right track. And for starters, I don't bloody hope that any of my kids would simply pass. Because they wish that I would help make their Cs and Ds As, and if I don't do everything in my power so that I could, what does that make me? How would I look in front of God bila dah balik nanti?

I terlalu ambitious? So f*ck off then.

***

A friend on FB tagged me a line which sounded like this, 'I don't do jealousy, not even when my ex is all over the new guy, because my mum said I should let the less fortunate have the toys I don't want.'

Looks like some retard's mum had just had a terrible lesbianic heartbreak, to come up with something like that. I mean seriously, if you're not jealous, don't mention her at all-lah. Itu pun susah? Ke engkau tengah sawan denial sebenarnya ni?

And yeah so you felt like I have insulted your mother. Hey, why did you bring her into the matter in the first place? She couldn't have referred to a girl when she said you should share your toys. No sane mother would, that much I know. So really, matanglah sikit. Ingat bagus ke putar-belit nasihat emak engkau macam itu?

Kalau tak boleh nak matang pun, show some respect-lah. She doesn't want you, then let her go sudah.Tak payah nak buat rujukan kat toys ke apa, bukan engkau pandai sangat Literature pun. Nak insult perempuan guna perkataan toys itu pun engkau tak layak. Emak engkau bukan perempuan? Nenek engkau bukan perempuan? Ex engkau bukan perempuan? Habis engkau lelaki ke - because you used to want her dulu kan?

***

Dan I sangat panas hati dengan a bunch of people yang tak reti nak faham frasa 'Tak mau'. Gilalah dunia ni, benda senang macam itu pun ada lagi yang tak boleh hadam. Kamu sembang guna bahasa planet apa di rumah?

***

Anything pissing anyone lately?

27 scribbleback (s):

Al-Saachez said...

i do notice that lately this week, a lot of people have been depressed and annoyed. maybe it's safe to say that this week is a bitter week? i don't know but seriously, i like the phrase you come up with ; sawan denial! that's an epic one sis. keep it up coming. hahaha

Adlan said...

wow. kak nani you are the best. kan best kalo dpt jd student akak.

Nabilah Anafi said...

cikgu sekolah mana ni?
nak semangat macam akak lah.

HiKaru said...

i like lesbianic.. hehe

Luna said...

Kurang ajar la line tu... Memang sawan denial...

ButirStar said...

cikgu ke hape yg ckp gitu? rasanya tu bukan cikgu la...itu cikgu ilusi. entah2 dia jd cikgu sebab dia give up nk kerja benda lain kot...

mmg x suka cikgu ckp cengitu kat students. semalam satu kelas budak form 3 dtg kat meja long, setiap sorang tanya satu soalan sebab hari ni depa ada post trial BI. terharu sgt bila depa dg ramai2 cam tu. budak lemah la yg paling tnya byk soalan. kaklong terfikir, apa perasaan depa kalau kaklong cakap 'awak ni ada harapan dpt C je' kat depa? ish2!

yg pasal FB tagging tu...giler ke?? dh la dia libatkan mak dia. long tak tau la dia atau mak dia yg insane...tp obviously nampak dia la yg insane.

Ayaq masak said...

Tak mau means tak mau lah. Doesn't mean 'please try again'. Kan?

Aisya Shurfa said...

A lot of teachers are like that, Nani. That only means they're giving up on THEMSELVES as teachers. Ugh.

adnin said...

go go teacher nani.. :)

avid gunner said...

i didn't go to school to get an A. i went to school to do to the best of my ability. and if my best ability gets me an A, then syukuuurr...

ah, btw a teacher who give up on his/her student to be the best shouldn't be a teacher in the first place. dia tak sanggup jadi 'lilin membakar diri'.

Nani Othman said...

aamir - aha. could be so. bitter week. i like that. XD hehe. yeah i like the phrase sawan denial, too. sounds very insulting and quite impressive, in my rather biased opinion. lol.

adlan - oh my, thanks. =) come to beseri then!

nabilah anafi - you're gonna have to venture into the past for that info. =) all the best!!

hikaru - i knew you would. lol.

luna - tell me about it. i just don't get men like this. so tak matang.

Nani Othman said...

long - ha, menarik istilah cikgu ilusi tu, kak long. tapi kan kak long, cikgu2 mcm ni setahu nani bukan yg give up tak dpt kerja lain, diorg ni mmg takde semangat nak tolong budak2. alasan mmg bertingkat2 ah kalau diorg boleh bagi - mmg segalanya mustahil la bagi diorg ni. atok engkaulah harap budak lulus - tak sedar Tuhan tengah tengok engkau lalaikan amanah ke? nani mmg tak suka cikgu yg sanggup ckp mcm tu kt depan atau belakang budak. budak umpat kita tu cerita lain, kita sebagai cikgu ampunkan sudahlah - selebihnya urusan Allah lah, takpayahlah kita pun ikut mengecikkan saiz otak sama saiz dgn otak budak. itu pun tak boleh fikir, haih mmg panas betul kalau bercakap bab ni.

ah yg fb tagging tu mmg dasar org tak sedar diri, perempuan yg engkau panggil toy tu sama jantina dengan emak engkau, dgn nenek engkau, dengan bakal bini engkau - itu pun kalau ade yg hendak dgn laki yg jiwa porak -peranda mcm engkau. ni lagi satu, panas betul bile mikirnye!


ayaq masak - itulah. ada org suka read between the lines, pdhal in between tu kosong je takde pape.

Nani Othman said...

aisya - i know. i've met some. i've talked to some. and i've listened to some. i'm angry at all of them. like seriously, giving up is easy - but taking everyone else down with you is another thing entirely. ish. so tak amanah.

avid gunner - first of all, i so despise the 'lilin' anology. teachers don't burn themselves for other people's sake - they shine like the sun to show the way. besides, i think teachers should better be associated with TNB, bila TNB buat hal baru org cari lilin. no one remembers a candle after it burns out - it's a complete 180 from the being a teacher is.

and your POV about a teacher who gives up on the kids shouldn;t be a teacher in the first place, i couldn't agree more. gimme five, mate! XD and yeah, getting and A and becoming the person you're meant to be are completely different. some people just don't get that.

Nani Othman said...

adnin - ish, terlepas pulak komen kamu. haha. go go go adnin!!

nani said...

a "lecturer" in my college is pissing me off right now. this "lecturer" of mine teaches animation and yet i have just as much knowledge abt animation as he does.

what takes the cake tho, is that he expects rm50k worthy artworks for our assignments. which he, himself can't do. and i am sure abt that. now as if that's not annoying already, he has a bias for one of my classmates. and he has the nerve to say, 'baik awak belajar dgn dia. saya pn belajar drpd dia' ok, wth?? so who's my lecturer now? him or you? i'm paying 3k a month, a percentage of that which goes into YOUR pocket, for you to say to me, that even YOU learn from my classmate? what the shit is up with that man? and aku bayar guna duit sdri ok? not loan money. baik aku suruh mak bapak aku simpan duit tu baik2 ntuk hari tua. eh, merepek sungguh la statement sebegitu. panas plak telinga.

as an art student, an art lecturer and just a teacher in general, you're supposed to INSPIRE us, right? so why is he sucking all my passion for art dry? he keeps referring us to such things like, 'assignment kamu kali ni, buat montage 3d. saya nk mcm tv3 tu.' eh, sng2 ko cakap kn? with absolutely zero basics on the software, how the hell does he expect us to come up with something like that? bijak sungguh la. sometimes i feel like crying. most of the time i just pull my hair out. i know that lecturers aren't supposed to spoon feed the students. but as far as i know, he should at least know the basics of a software and teach that to us. it's like asking a baby who hasn't learned how to stand up, to run. macam mana?

he pisses me off so much! safe to say, because of his teaching method, i am currently experiencing a severe artblock. everytime i show a draft for my projects, he rejects it saying he wants something more elaborate 'macam abduzeedo' ok, first of all abduzeedo is a professional graphic artist. you see how my passion can get stunted like that? i dunno apa yg patut or x patut la. but IMO, i think an art teacher should nurture a student's natural skills and instincts. not force them to a standard they cannot achieve. yet. or force them into an art style that is not natural to them. you do art. you know the feeling don't you?

macam dia dah ada a set expectation in his mind. a very high expectation. (which is that classmate of mine punya standard la.) so everytime he sees something that isn't on par with that, he immediately rejects it and considers it an unworthy piece. unfair gla la.

adoila, nani. i dunno whether i'm the wrong one here or not. i confide in my mom abt this and she seems to think that i'm the one complaining a lot and the problem lies with me. maybe she's right la kan.

nani said...

btw, yes, you can do the tag if you so please. hehe^^ and i read that disgusting fanfic site. macam you cakap. PUKE-WORTHY reading material. i have no idea why these girls have any followers. ew. i just killed a few hundred of my precious braincells just reading a few lines. the rest of which i skimmed through. i mean like,

"abanggg~" wth? you're kidding with me right now. oh, right, you're not kidding. because a real person actually wrote that piece of garbage. *sigh*

avid gunner said...

hey, it's a peribahasa. peribahasa supposed to sound classic and old. dulu2 mana ada tnb?? lol

ButirStar said...

kekadang long terfikir, kenapa diaorang nak jadi cikgu in the first place.....

diaorang ingat kerja cikgu ni senang ke?? memang mudah dapat pahala besar tapi mudah jugak dapat dosa free. cikgu2 kaklong dekat sekolah ni pun ada jugak yang ckp gitu kat students dia. cikgu BI lak tu. pastu, dia suruh long cakap gitu jugak kat bebudak nakal kelas long.

long tak sanggup sebab budak2 ada perasaan jugak. karang maunya jadik kat anak kita balik, baru tau. ish, taknak la long jadi gitu.

cikgu tu ingat dia bagus sangat ke sampai kata kat students dia tak de harapan untuk dapat A dlm PMR? apa kata dia sendiri yang amik PMR...leh compare sape yg tak de harapan sebenarnya....

Nani Othman said...

nani - back then when i was in uitm, my fren had a lecturer like that too. most of the times she'd be stressed out, nervous beyond reason everytime she needs to go to class and well..she just hated the lecturer.

i agree that an art teacher, or any teacher is supposed to be inspiring students to develop their own potential - there's no ONE way to do art, i mean that's insane! i'd cuss away if i were you..and i'll try to find the way to clear things up..tho i don't know how. XD

i hope you'd figure a way out of the mess. no art is better than the other, because none of us operate on the same freaking plane of artistic thinking. maybe you should re-talk to your mum?

and yeah the pukeworthy fanfic blog, tell me about it. reading a complete post would definitely send you to an asylum. haha.

Nani Othman said...

avid gunner - that's not a peribahasa. it's an analogy. and i prefer analogies with meaning, not just some emotional words strung together describing an inferior way of thinking. like, you spell avid backwards, you get diva. XD

Nani Othman said...

long - haha. nani jadi cikgu sebab nani taknak pandai sorang-sorang. nani nak pandai ramai-ramai. simple as that. tak payah sembang nk didik anak bangsa segala mak nenek, esok mati Tuhan tak tanya berapa ramai budak melayu dapat A, berapa budak bukan melayu yang aku tolong separuh hati. tolong ah fikir sblum bercakap.

speaking of cikgu BI berotak keji yg ikut sedap mulut dia nak judge budak lemah tu, nani pun ade pengalaman yg hampir sama ah. tp dgn org nani tak kenal la.. heh. mcm baguslah kan kate budak lemah, padahal kerja dia menjadikan budak tidak lemah - tah pape ah. otak tak matang kot.

ye betul. budak2 ade perasaan. tak payah kite nk act big just because kita cikgu, pastu sedap2 je ckp anak org lemah. nnt anak die org ckp mcm tu baru die tau.

haha. suruh die re-take ah SPM ke PMR ke, baru tau sape patut jd cikgu sape patut masuk tadika balik.

ButirStar said...

long ada tanya students form 3 long, apa perasaan mereka kalau cikgu kata mereka tak de harapan...ini antara jawapan2 mereka:

"saya rasa nak bakar rumah cikgu tu"
"tu cikgu ke makcik cleaner? makcik cleaner tak cakap cam tu"
"saya nak bunuh diri"
"eh, pandai2 je kata kat kita macam tu? ingat kita ni robot?"
"saya akan doakan cikgu tu masuk neraka kalau result saya jatuh. sebab cikgu tu yang doakan benda yg tak baik untuk saya"

Nani Othman said...

looks like some teachers only have themselves to blame lah if they screw up in their lives.

and then they claim to be speaking realistically. what a joke.

Aisya said...

During my short stint as a lecturer, I heard some other lecturers pass the wrong judgments at other lecturers. I know one lecturer who is determined and whose goal in life is to actually educate students and get them to excel. Guess what the other lecturers called her? They called her 'idealistic', and they say it in a most negative tone, as if believing your students can all berjaya is something so unrealistic. Ugh.

Nani Othman said...

aisya - that's awful. being passionate about teaching that much isn't being idealistic or unrealistic - it's only unrealistic if your effort is also unrealistic. please-lah. so grossgusting.

nani said...

hehe^^ i'm sure a lot of students all over are experiencing and have experienced these kinds of educators. inadequate in their profession.

ugh. i'm just dealing with it right now. i just wanna get this done and get my diploma. if i need to pull my hair out and go bald to achieve that, then so be it. no use confronting the guy. (he's only 26 btw.) he'll only come up with excuses. grr~

and my mom? haha. i need to slow down whenever i'm venting i guess. get her to understand my perspective. thanks for the advice. keke^^

Nani Othman said...

oh my, so young. XD haha. just work your best and get the best you could. i wish you luck. and yeah maybe you should guna cara halus, give examples, suruh your mum wear your shoes in various occasion..smpai die faham what you're complaining about. hehe. XD

Post a Comment

Only a Sith deals in absolutes. Your thoughts?