October 10, 2012


This is one of those books I had betrayed by flipping to the last page to get to the ending before actually reading it. One of those really few books. (Don't look at me like that.) And I swear to God, I am not at all proud of having done that. I swear. Not at all proud. As a book nerd, that's just something we don't do. But I'm not your standard book nerd, so I've been crossing some lines. Some really serious lines - I did it to HP7 too, some years ago and to some other really 'sacred' titles and no, I am not proud. But I don't regret it either, so you can hate me. I mean it. Seriously, it really was HP7. I wasn't joking.

Now Nevermore. The best thing about it is the fact that Max and Fang got back together so whatever pathetic remnants of what little I have of my deteriorating sanity didn't evaporate into nothingness like what my friends had predicted, and here I am, writing my fluttering heart to you. Hehe. Been a while, haven't I? OK, back to where we were: I had been hyperventilating since the last book when Fang left the flock, breaking Max's heart (and MINE, of course) and started a gang which involved Max II. And then Dylan walked in - perfection at its best, programmed to love Max more than anything else in the world and specially designed to be Max's perfect other half (oh God I actually wrote that) so everything, I mean it; EVERYTHING was chaos and I almost mentally died. I'd been in campaigns urging Mr Patterson to actually kill someone off and return Fang home - and that's wherever Max is, I'd been crazy emotional on Tumblr and everywhere else and I had also been frighteningly unstable (intellectually and mentally) - I was disturbed, which is so normal, if you really know me. Morons don't disturb me. Books do.

The first few chapters were Fang and Maya moments and Max and Dylan moments so I was, 'OMG I hate this book!!' and my students who saw me were like, 'Teacher? You OK?' I'd smile and continue rushing through the pages like the world was ending - yeah I exaggerate, so what? Anyway, yeah, someone died and Fang came back and I cried here and there as I was reading. And when he told Max he loves her, I thought, 'My first love should really be like this. The end of the world isn't near, it is here. But he was here, too and that's all that should matter.' I cried when the whitecoats hurt Angel. I cried when the flock found out that she was alive. I cried when Max cried (in Dylan's arms pft!). Well, I kind of cried everytime things get emotional. And I cried when Max and Fang were in each other's arms and the monstrous wave was threatening to swallow them alive right after they both realize how much they mean to each other and how little time they have to live that fact.

Then the book ended. And my favourite chapter is the 79th. Definitely the 79th. Because there's so much love in that few pages. So much love it spilled from the pages. I don't care if you don't believe me. It spilled and I fell in love. If I were to really fall in love one day, I hope it'd somehow feel like the chapter 79th.

" Fang held me tightly, like he'd never, ever let go again, and we kissed for what felt like eternity, for all of those tense moments that had been building between us for years, and for every second we'd been apart. We kissed like we were inhaling each other, like we would live and die in this moment.

We kissed like the world was ending."

A part of me was breaking as I realize that there will be no more Max after this since this is the last book of the series but a bigger part was proud that this final installment concluded a lot of things nicely, although some of them aren't done they way I wished they'd be. But that's OK, really. What fun is there in reading if everything goes your way, no? So, yeah. I was almost broken but I was also saved and everything is OK again. I'm all sane (not really, since I'm now working my way through A Song of Ice and Fire and it's crazy good I can't even, yeah) and breathing.

And I am back.

It's really been a while since I was last myself. But I'm here now, and I'm all me. I realized too, that I hadn't really been gone. So here I am and you'll be seeing a lot of me from now on. And by a lot, I mean, a lot. I'll be writing more often. I'll be drawing more often. I'll be returning visits more often.

So you should be around, too.